Instagram is a great place! You can post your pictures, look at the aesthetics of other people’s profile, try to make your profile look the same and fail miserably. But all in all, Instagram is fun! But sometimes you come across posts and profiles and you think “this is the kind of stuff that can be used as an argument against net neutrality.” The cringe is so real and so hard that you wish for your eyes to un-see it but you can’t for that post and those words are now etched into your minds. Here are ten posts that you can send people if you wish to creep them out to the extremes.
- When the possessiveness is very real:
I mean isn’t this what love is all about? Finding a special someone and never letting them go. Never. Ever. So if you’ve got a special someone in your life let them know about this. Think Shah Rukh Khan from the movie Darr. That’s right kids, THAT’S what true love is all about.
- It’s called emotional blackmail just FYI:
Even though this is a manipulative behavior and borderline psychopathic but hey, all is fair in love and war right? Even if it is threatening someone to stay with you. Totally normal behavior. So, go ahead grab your significant other, look them into their eyes and tell them how you’ll kill yourself if they ever left you. Nothing strengthens a relationship like emotional blackmail after all.
- This one might have hit home:
Too poor for plastic surgery and makeup? Even your genetics totally ditched you? Yep, you’re gonna die alone. Love is only for pretty people guys. Rest of us don’t get to procreate.
- Umm have you ever tried cheese burst pizza?
And you thought passing an exam you thought you were surely failing was the best feeling in the world. Pfft! So go ahead, grab hold of your significant other and get married at your nearest mandir/mazjid/church/gurudwara/ courthouse/bouncy house today!
- Visit your nearest Optician today!
And you thought glasses were to just help you see. You are wrong. Glasses make you cute, like puppies. You’re irresistible now. All you glassless people are never going to find love whether you’re simple or have a dimple and no pimple.
- And I thought this was known as an unstable relationship:
Who even comes up with these? Honestly, such profound wisdom! Why not compile all these and make it into a book called “Jaanu why you no maanu”
- ………..wow, okay:
You stayed with one woman all your life? Someone call Guinness Book of World Records we have someone who did the impossible. Here’s your Nobel prize, Oscar, Filmfare, Pulitzer, my first born child, a soul of a virgin. Take it, it’s all yours!
- I have the purest of hearts then : )
Actually, they might just need anger management classes but what does a loveless person like me know? Maybe this is love. People losing their temper at you and you forgive them thinking how their heart is so “SAAF” just like a floor cleaned with disinfectant.
- Is jaanu, shona, babu, laalu all done with?
All you guys out there, take notes. Call your girlfriends your wife and ask your mom to refer to her as bahu and your siblings to call her bhabhi. Next, watch as she leaves you and runs away at the speed of life.
- Where’s my Nobel Prize in bravery?
All you girls who manage their daily moods AAALLL BY THEMSELVES, this one for you. Rest of us women can hardly function without our personal mood trainers you know? Yeah, we’re not brave at all. This post just upset me, brb calling my mood trainer now.